From redthumb89108

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Hi Vanessa

I downloaded your GALEXY AT WAR and other of the Galactic Chronicles from SoL. I then convert them to Word for MY OWN USE

I saw that you are rewriting the GALEXY AT WAR. Based what I have seen in your ERIC OLAFSON, NEO-VIKING and EARTH, please pay attention to the rules of punctuation regarding to quotation marks. Several times you do not have an opening quote mark, but do have a closing one. At other times you have a misplaced quote mark. (All examples will be from Neo-Viking unless noted.)Example from chapter 26: <"You are a very fortunate father, Isegrim!" to the Engineer he said." Do what it takes. I'll pay for it!"> It should be “...he said. “Do what...” Chapter 27, the sales man said, "You picked the top of the line" and he...>. There should be a comma with the closing quote mark. When referring to the old man, you say , , , and. You need to be consistant. I think the problem is one of three. Either it is sloppiness (or not knowing) (which I don’t believe), or thinking that you are under a deadline and not taking time to check it over carefully or thinking that you see one thing and it is another.

Another item to be addresses in that of capitalization. ALL proper nouns i.e. personal names of people should be capitalized. In chapter 25 you have < Chairman of the very influential Trade and finance committee of the Union.> Why is trade capitalized and not finance? In chapter 26 you have . Father should be capitalized. Chapter 26 . Why is Son capitalized? BTY it should be son-in-law. 

All sentences MUST end with some sort of punctuation, either a period, question mark, exclamation point, or ellipsis. Chapter 28 < and again the reassuring feel of the sword's balance in my fist seemed to infuse me with new life> Again 28 <"I heard you purchased two new Submarines," She chirped in an inquisitive manner,> Ending a sentence with a comma? Also why is “she” capitalized? 

I did your remake of Stagecoach (calling it SPACE BUS TO BENTON’S COLONY. 

In SPACE BUS you call the Archa engineer Frabbel eight times (chapter 2 1x; chapter 3 2x; chapter 5 2x; and chapter 6 3x) and Frappel four times in chapter 3. In one paragraph you use both spellings. 

In chapter 13 of THE ADVENTURES OF A GREENIE you spell the character Leris Brathan’s name with one and two R’s (Leris and Lerris).