New Edit: Caught



Caught

They had shown me to a small alcove chamber carved, like many similar ones into  the big caverns wall.

Inside, behind a curtain was a real bed. I was more tired as I realized and fell into a deep and dreamless sleep as soon as my head hit the pillow.

The next day  I did not wake on my own but was called out while I still felt tired. The seemingly perpetual burning fusion sun  and its bright light made any guess what time it was completely impossible, at least to me.

The woman I had met yesterday. stood just outside the curtain and she was dressed very much  like I expected a woman warrior to look, not that I had seen one outside illustrations and tapestries. She wore a kind of armor apparently made of hard leather molded to accommodate her female shape. Underneath a short white tunic that flaring  and swinging like a short skirt revealed much of her shapely legs. Her curly hair pulled to the back and tamed into a pony tail with a leather strap adorned with feathery things to the side. She held two long spears.

"Good Morning Eric !" She handed me one of the spears and said. "The spear is one of human kinds oldest weapon. In our old languages a man with a Ger became to be known as German and the word evolved to the name of an old Earth tribe, the Germans. “

The spear she had given me had a wooden shaft and was set on the top with a pointed double edged tip of metal. I wanted to impress her and said after I had bowed and said." Odin's spear is named Gungir and it is infallible and its tip cannot be broken. The Elders of the Circle and the Clan Chiefs swear on Gungir the most sacred oaths!" I then hastily added." Your Ladyship."

She did nod with a knowledgeable smile." My name is Siegfrida and you may call me by my name."

She turned the spear and drew a simple arrow in the dirt." This is the Tir rune in the writing of the old Vikings on Earth and it is still used by the druids, the Elder and the wise men of Nilfeheim. It has the meaning of war, victory, law and cosmic order and is associated with the ancient Germanic and Aryan sky god Tir. This rune also resembles Irmunsul the world tree."

For at least an hour she told me about runes and their meaning. Many were familiar to me as they were used everywhere as decorations and appeared as symbols in clan heraldry.

After that she asked me to follow her to a different cave and she explained that these chambers once were formed by hot magma bubbles and flows while the Volcano was  active.

She was a patient but demanding teacher and the fact that she was a woman somehow spurned the male warrior ego that was part of perhaps every Neo Vikings personality. I think I would not have tried as hard if she was a male instructor. For the next 3 weeks I hurled spears, fought with shield, spear, axe and sword until I could no longer feel my arms. Unlike my mysterious teacher back at the burg or our fight instructors at school while I was still allowed to go, she was not cruel and did not  inflict  injuries and bruised on purpose but I still thought there was not a spot left on my body without one. Every night I was allowed to the baths and the warm water did wonders easing and soothing the bruised and relaxing tense muscles.

It was also a wonderful time. She was full of stories and wisdom about our culture and the gods. She told a story about the Aseir and the legends and then explained the meaning of the story and the symbolism and why that story was told.

Down here I had not wasted a thought on father or the miserable time at our burg. I felt accepted and was allowed to sit with everyone on the same table during the shared meals.

No one was making fun of me, no one told me what a looser or how unwanted I was. No one was beating or kicking me and I did not have to be afraid of noises or heavy footsteps that would announce the appearance of father.

The Old Man the Old Keeper was not always around but when he was he also was full of stories about the early times of the Nilfeheim colony.

I had completely lost any track of time, the weather and the light did not change down here inside the mountain.

Today, after what felt only a short time of training. She stopped and put the training weapons back into their racks."I have to tend to a sick friend and won't be back till tomorrow evening, but that means you have extra time to pass today, so if you want you can help with some of the chores around here. Everyone does them, so don't feel I am punishing you."

"I don't mind doing chores and I am not afraid of work, I do them since I can remember."

"Well if you don't mind you could go to the baths and mop the tiles in both areas and the change rooms. You find the cleaning tools and supplies in a storage corner in the change area. No one will be there at this time so please do the women side too."

"No problem, I can do that.”

"You should have plenty of time to enjoy a long bath as well.". She smiled and added." The Ancient one will fill in for me tomorrow I am sure you can find your way to the baths and then to dinner yourself by now."

She left and I did make my way towards the baths. In that corridor that linked the baths to the Big Cavern, I always had the strangest sensation. Something I could not really explain. It was no pain or discomfort, and I usually forgot about it as soon as I felt it. Whenever I passed through the concealed passage it felt as if some unseen hidden force pushed me inside. Almost as if stepping on a faster moving slide belt. My thoughts lingered on this only a heart beat longer than usual. Here in the old corridor that led to the old elevator and the baths were  several passage ways branching of into darkness. Siegfrida explained that these corridors were created  because they were expecting all colonists move inside the mountain as the first winter turned out to be longer than a few month and became the first Longnight humans had to survive. Now these corridors led to dark and empty, never completed caverns. The light down here came from old Lumi Plates salvaged from the Arks. Ingenious devices  creating cold light form a radiation source, but produced no harmful radiation. Terran  engineers had created them to last hundreds of years, and many of the Lumi plates still worked after almost 3000 years just like the day they were made. Only a few no longer produced any light or had become very dim.

The inside of this old volcano was occupied by this secretive group for almost as long but their numbers were slowly but steadily declining. Despite their efforts  the Old man had told me that there were now less than eighty and they started out with about two hundred. I did the math in my head and felt they did not really have any immediate problem of disappearing, if they declined in numbers at the same rate as they did till now, they still had 2000 years before the last one was gone.

It was easy to think in terms of 1000 years and accept the fact that my female teacher really was over thousand years old. Since I could not really fathom what it meant. There was simply no reference I could apply to really understand, but whenever I was thinking about it, I felt a little uneasy and shivered and wondered if a being that could look back on a thousand years of life experience really was still human.

From Union Class I knew there were member species that looked upon very long life spans. Of course I heard about the Stories of the two hundred Human immortals who were guiding human kind since the beginning and like most I believed them to be legends and myths at least until know.

Mr. Walters said that medicine could easily extend the life of most any carbon based life form including humans. Brains could be implanted in Robot and Android bodies and eliminate most biological limitations and brain pattern activity could be imprinted on a Computronic. Ever since the Insane Robot Coup attempt of 2412, uploading and individuals personality and brain into a Computronic was prohibited. All manufactured robots and Androids were by law determined to be things and had to be base programmed. Creating sentient machines was strictly prohibited to anyone but Mothermachine. I only knew little about the  X101, a member species of sentient machines but they did not provide other species with their own robot bodies.

In that lesson Mr. Walters said that the average lifespan for humans was about 150 years. Even though longer life was medically possible he said that most minds simply got tired and a strong longing to die developed and the suicide rate among those reaching the bicentennial age increased drastically with each passing year. It was not against the law to extend life beyond the age of 250 but as Mr. Walters said no one really wanted it.

While I was pondering the long life span of the Keepers I had reached the baths and decided to use that extra time not just to bathe but to swim, the pool basin was certainly big enough for that, but I would do my chore first. By know I knew there were two bath areas one for men and one for women. Both areas were  identical in size and layout  except the tiles on the male side were blue and the tiles in the womens bath were red. In between were the facilities with showers and toilets and places were you could dress and undress. It all had been built to accommodate the   colonists of Hasvik. They never came and never used it. Of course the Keepers had kept it in good repair all that time.

I could not find any mop or bucket or anything else on the mens side so I knocked at the separating swing door then opened it and said aloud." Anyone here?"

My voice slightly echoed and appeared louder than intended but no one answered, there was only the drip of water. So I went in and sure enough there was a corner with buckets, mops and the wonderful smelling lemon stuff they made themselves to clean pretty much everything. So I mopped the womens side first.

There around the corner in the dressing area on the bench lay that leather breast harness molded to Siegfrieda's body. Not far from it, on a peg a blue dress and white apron. A small shelf next to it held artful little glass bottles, decorated ceramic tubs and jars.

This was not mother's boudoir and not her dress. There was no reason for me to wear it and yet felt the urge to do just that. If I would wear that breast harness underneath it would give the dress the right shape, a shapely illusion

I pushed the mob and shook my head. It was wrong what I did in mother's boudoir even though it made me feel close to mother. I was a Neo Viking and I needed to become strong and big. A warrior would not wear a woman's garments.

Thor did it.

But he didn't like it and did it only once out of necessity. So why did I feel strangely excited every time I mopped past that dress?

I forced myself to think about something else and left doing the other side of the baths, but I was done. I knew it was still early and I had time. I wished someone would come, Women perhaps using the baths but it remained eerie silent. I had to return the cleaning supplies.

I almost could hear my own argument, on the one hand I tried to ignore my feelings as I knew they were wrong, but then what would it hurt? No one would ever know, just to see how it looks.

I undid my braids.

The chest piece fit real nice and as I slipped into the dress it really did what I hoped it would and along with the white apron looking into a mirror I really looked like a girl now, even the shape was now perfect.

A new feeling of euphoria, of suddenly being unshackled and free engulfed me from the ddepest inside  and while something in me still warned me but I ignored it  and that inner voice felt silent.

As I turned a little to see me myself from the side I noticed Siegfrida standing there, her arms crossed.

Seeing her hit me like a cold shower and  I wished the ground would open to swallow me. I started shaking and the sensation of utmost shame came over me.

She looked around and then nodded. "I see you did a good job cleaning."

I tried to say something, but my throat was constricted and even if I knew what to say I would have not been able to utter a single word.

"I had a chance in plans and came to fetch you for dinner. Ulrike made dumplings today."

Then she came closer and said. "The Ancient suspected this and that is why he asked me to leave those things here."

I shivered and could not bring my shaking hands and knees under control. I finally managed to say." He knew?"

She smiled and nodded."He is very old and has seen it all. Human nature holds no mysteries to him."

The old man appeared behind me next to the mirror.

"I visited your burg to learn more about you and when I heard your Midril speak about servants seeing  the ghost of the fair lady in the windows of the First ladies old rooms I had my suspicions and I asked Siegfrida to do this little test."

He put his hand on my shoulder."Don't be afraid. I wish I could offer you to stay here in Muspelheim so you can be free of the tyranny of your father, but your place is not here.”

I relaxed a little."I am sorry...I did not …"

"Don't be sorry, you did nothing wrong in our eyes, this world however is not made for someone like you if it ever comes to light. No one will even try to understand."

I could not stop my tears. "I don't really understand it myself. I know it is wrong."

"Siegfrida said I know human nature, Eric I would have to live twice as many years than I already have to really understand the motivations of a woman. All I really learned in my long life, that there are still many mysteries to this the human condition. I am sure the scholars and experts of the Union have a perfect explanation.

It is not the question why you do this, but finding the answer and accepting it that will give you the peace you must find.”

He padded my shoulder. “You do look nice. Let's go for dinner. All this talk made me hungry and there really are dumplings.”

"Like this?"

"Why not? "

Siegfrida smiled and offered me her arm."He is always hungry as you know by now."