From: Louis Wu

Re: Adventures of a Greenie - Chapter 24

From: Louis_Wu6/24/2018, 9:51:42 AM

This could be a superb story, unfortunately there are sections repeated, sections out of order and, it seems some parts of the story missing.

I'm not going to vote on this as I could give it no more than a 5, probably less, as it stands. You need a good editor to go over it and knock it into shape, then a meticulous proofreader. After that repost it and let us, your readers, know. If you do that I'll read it again and give an honest score.