New PM from Mukund.Madhu



You have received a private message from:

Name: Mukund.Madhu Profile: http://www.fictionpress.com/u/868714/

Reply link: https://www.fictionpress.com/pm2/post.php?rid=626140#new

Subject: Space Bus to Benton's Colony

Dear Vanessa,

I just have two comments.

Towards the end of Chapter 5, there is one line "Peacock stared in amazement at his missing arm. The energy blast had burned much of his seat and his right arm, his face frozen in agony he sinks to the floor with a gurgling sound."

And then at the start of Chapter 6, there is a line that goes "Doc Boone just came down from the flight deck where he was fighting to keep Wilcox alive. "Hawk I need you...".

I think this is the first reference to the fact that Wilcox is injured. And no further reference to Peacock's missing arm. This is a bit confusing. Could you clarify? Or correct as need be?

On your request for a vote - I vote for a continuation of your newest ISAH story. While I thoroughly enjoyed the whole Eric series, I think it's good - even for us readers - to take a bit of a break from the intensity of that storyline.

Thanks for putting in your time into writing. I think you've built up a great 'universe' here!

Best Regards, Mukund

FictionPress.com Messaging Service